Spencetology

Fantasy Football Crisis Hotline

I’ve said this more than a few times. You want me in your fantasy football league. Why? Right around week three, I cease to give one, let alone two, fucks.

Did your steak used to say, “Moo,” or “Nay?” Here’s a parody of the Stones’ “Wild Horses.”

That being said, I still want to win. It’s why, like most fantasy football players, I stress out over the draft. I do research. In fact, this year, I ran all of my possible picks through ChatGPT. We’ll see how that goes.

Now, for those that really do freak out everytime their name is called to pick a player for their team, there’s a service available to make it a bit less painful.

Fall isn’t for another month or so, but Corporate Autumn has already began. Learn more.

You’re on your fourth pick. Your running game looks weak. Every player you projected to be available at this point in your fantasy draft is gone. You’re about to panic. Before you make one terrible mistake that will ruin your fantasy season, you should call the Fantasy Football Crisis Hotline.