Spencetology

A White Guy’s Guide to Super Bowl Spanish

When Puerto Rican-born Bad Bunny (Benito Antonio Martínez Ocasio) was announced as the featured halftime entertainment at Super Bowl LX this February, not everyone was pleased.

Finally, a dating app exclusively for furloughed federal workers. Learn more about Furloughmance.

Right-wing pundits from former racecar driver Danica Patrick to Speaker of the House, Mike Johnson voiced their angst at having a performer sing and rap in Spanish.

In one interview, Fox News contributor Tomi Lahren, claimed the selection was un-American. She seemed unaware that, as a territory of the United States., people born in Puerto Rico are, in fact, U.S. citizens.

By birth alone, Bad Bunny is more “American” than our First Lady, Melania Trump.

After the Ryder Cup, the PGA, and the UFC have joined forces to create the Professional Golfer’s Fighting Championship.

“The King of Latin Trap” was unmoved by, what some would call, racist criticism and provided a simple solution during his opening monologue on Saturday Night Live’s broadcast on October 4, 2025.

Bad Bunny made a statment in Spanish then chided his critics. “If you didn’t understand what I just said. You have four months to learn.”

So, let’s get started. Attention gringos! Introducing The White Guy’s Guide to Super Bowl Spanish.