Spencetology

Emotional Support Canadians

If you’ve ever lived in an apartment, you know how vital it is to your well-being to have a good upstairs neighbor.

At some point, most of us have experienced a rude, obnoxious butthole living a floor above us.

A Breakthrough in Male Contraception is here – The Cybertruck

You have the one who sounds like they’re pet sitting an elephant. If it’s not their Bluetooth speaker blasting out the jams, it’s their vacuum cleaner doing a thorough clean up at 3am.

Canada is North America’s friendly upstairs tenant. Canada would never park in your assigned parking spot and then leave town for a week. The sheriff’s department doesn’t make regular visits. Canadians are polite. Canadians are courteous.

So, why the f*** are we f***ing with the best upstairs neighbors in the history of apartments?

Oh yeah, elections have consequences.

Enjoy some “Un-Valentines Day Songs”

Among all this tariff-talk and threats of of being “51st state,” Canadians are still lovingly here to help their American neighbors with an empathetic ear or a shoulder to cry on. If you’re struggling getting through the day-to-day anxiety of a second Trump presidency, maybe you should get an Emotional Support Canadian.