The National Straw Association

Posted by admin on July 11, 2018 Audio | Blog | Parody Spots | Tags: , , , , | No comments

So, a video of a turtle with a straw stuck in its nose goes viral and results in plastic straws becoming public enemy #1. In the last week, McDonalds, American Airlines and Starbucks have all announced that they will stop using plastic straws. Hell, Starbucks are going to basically deliver your coffee via an “adult sippy cup.”

Who is out there to protect the people employed in the plastic straw industry? I mean, it has to be a multi-million dollar enterprise, right? There are people in Iowa, probably, who are panicked that their livelihood, built upon making plastic straws will be sucked away because of one, stupid turtle.

Fortunately, the NSA, the National Straw Association is here to fight for all Americans and their inalienable right suck sugary carbonated liquid through a plastic tube.