Organic Prison

Posted by admin on February 9, 2021 Audio | Blog | Parody Spots | Tags: , , , , , , , | No comments

After storming the Capitol in war paint while wearing a horned coyote headdress, we just figured the QAnon Shaman was simply a nut job. No, not exactly. He’s an organic food eating nut job. Perhaps instead of moving him to a prison where his dietary requests can be fulfilled, we should just create the first Organic Prison.

Maybe Morgan Wallen said what he said on purpose. Learn about “Career Busters.” 

His real name is Jacob Chansley. He’s from Arizona and has become famous as the face of insurrectionists at the Capitol Building on January 6, 2021. Last week a federal judge granted Chansley the right to enjoy organic food while being held on six federal charges. He claimed that non-organic food was against his religion and sickened him. While he’s enjoying items you’d find at Whole Foods, the rest of genpop is eating bologna and ramen. Mmmm, healthy.

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The story made me reevaluate my criminal rehabilitation belief system. Maybe the inmates should wear Tie Dye instead of orange. Instead of lifting weights they should lift spirits. Instead of “Pruno” (prison wine) why not Kombucha?

Well, now we have. Introducing Organic Prison where you’ll come because you broke the law but you’ll stay for the tantric group sex.

Organic Prison