Spencetology

Idea Sheet

Dick Pic or Dick– On the heels of Chris Evans’ accidental dic pic reveal on his InstaStory. Let’s play “Dick Pic or Dick.” You name a male celebrity and the caller has to identify whether the public has seen their weenis or they’re just a prick.  

Dick Pic                                          Dick

Ben Affleck “Gone Girl”                   Alec Baldwin
Jason Segel “Sarah Marshall”        Donald Trump
Chris Evans                           Christian Bale
HOFer Brett Favre                                Ellen
Michael Fassbender “Shame”                Chevy Chase
Kanye West                          Kanye West
Chris Brown                              Bill Cosby
Justin Bieber                          Justin Bieber
Orlando Bloom                          Sean Penn
Draymond Green                         Russell Crowe
Jamie Foxx                    Mel Gibson
50 Cent                    Kevin Spacey
Drake                               Shia LaBeouf
Diplo
Steve-O
Calum Hood
Jude Law
Usher

In addition to the Chris Evans story, here in Vegas, our national anthem singer, believe it or not, goes by the nickname”Golden Pipes” was catfished. He, apparently, had sent this person numerous pics of his Capt. America and the personbehind the account tried to blakmail him. Rumor has it, for $1,500. I know this because, Carnell Johnson, his real name,tried to get in front of it by telling the story on Twitter. He posted the conversations where the blackmailer cajoled him into sending the pics…and then threatened him. He broke the first rule of dick pics. NEVER SHOW YOUR FACE. Who doesn’t know that rule?

Tried to Sell Porn on FB Marketplace – We have a storage unit and the assholes raised our rent 57% starting in Oct. So, we’re trying to get everything out of there by then. I have a “Big Bucket of Porn.” Over the years when AVN wasgoing on, they would bring in tons of porn to the station for promotion. I took the lion’s share. Now, it’s all on DVD.It’s all still in the cellophane wrapping. I never watched it. Why would I DVD porn when I have the internet? I posted it on FB Marketplace and apparently you can’t sell adult films. WTF?!?! Has anyone taken the time to find the weirdest shit available? Screwing around on Next Door, I was able to post a “gently used” sex swing. Some of the responses were funny.

I Hate Pennies – They’re pointless. They cost more to manufacturer than they are worth. I leave pennies behind. I don’t want them. At the Walmart self-checkout, I grab the silver but leave the pennies. One dickhead I used to work with always tried to shame me by saying, “There’ll never be a day that I’m too big not to pick up a penny.” When I had them, I would throw them on the ground in the studio. What’s the point? Pennies? DVDs? JCPennys?