Spencetology

Bunker Bitch

With peaceful Black Lives Matters protests heating up outside the 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue our commander in chief fled to the safety of the White House bunker.

“I was there for a tiny, short little period of time,” he said, adding it was “more for an inspection,” claimed 45. Interesting how he had 3 1/2 years to inspect his secure presidential fortification but decided to do so during the angry protests that followed the murder of George Floyd. Hmmmmm?

Bunker Bitch was born. Honestly, I like Bunker Boy too but I came up with the line, “Bunker Bitch, underground having Twitter fits” and that was all the inspiration I needed.

Whether he’s tucked under his oval office desk, cowering behind Kellyanne Conway’s skirt or in a fetal position in the White House cellar, a tribute to our president using the classic Spider-Man theme song.

Lyrics:

Bunker Bitch. Bunker Bitch, shivering in a White House ditch.
Scared to death of BLM…ordered troops to scare them.
Look down! There goes the Bunker Bitch.

Is he strong? Listen sir. Woulda fought wasn’t for bone spurs.
He was here. Where’d he go? Take a look down below.
Down there. There goes the Bunker Bitch.

With his Tweets at night. He sounds like a tough guyBut shine the bright light In the cellar, he’ll hide.
 
Bunker Bitch. Bunker Bitch, underground having Twitter fits.
He won’t say, “Black Lives Matter.” He’ll play some golf and get fatter.
That’s him. When he gets scared it’s lights out. He’ll run down the stairs and hideout. You’ll find the Bunker Bitch